Value - Or, Just Say NO!

I read an opinion piece today about artists and their value.  While it specifies those in the artistic industry such as photography and videography, I find this applies to both my crafting and my work.

I am frequently asked to knit, sew, craft, etc...items for friends when they see what I've made.  Some offer payment, others offer to buy the materials, and still others just expect me to do it for the fun of doing it and offer it as a gift.

Before I began to sew and knit seriously, I often thought that hand knit items were ridiculously overpriced; that was until I sat down and knit my first sweater and sewed my first dress.  Then I realized that people offer handcrafted items for sale are woefully underpaid.  My tastes run towards more costly items like fine quality yarns and stylish fabrics so when someone sees something I've made, they don't realize that my handmade item cost maybe twice what it would have cost if I'd picked it up in a store.  After factoring time to craft the item, well...it's a hobby as I tell people, and I don't make things for fun and profit, just for fun.  I do knit and sew for others as gifts, but when I have requests, more often than not I will say no.

That's hard for me, saying no.  I was raised to give of myself and then give more, but I rarely have time for the crafts that I love so much and having to do them for other people makes it onerous.  I actually will put off crafting an item for other people's requests until the very last minute because I am just not feeling it.

As for work, that's a very hard one for me.  I have learned to accept rejection of my rates, hard as it may be, and to refuse to offer services when potential clients attempt to haggle me down.  I've done favors before, but I've often found that the favors are seldom returned and rarely appreciated.  They also tend to lead to multiple requests for favors.

The other day I had such a request.  I would normally charge about $280 plus, given the condition of the home, a $40 wear and tear fee on my equipment and sanity.  I was offered less than half my standard rate, and as much as I wanted to help a person I like, I politely declined their offer and told them my rate is my rate, friendship aside.

Of course, there's a part of me inside that thinks that extra money would be nice, I could do something nice with the kids or invest in some hiking equipment for my big fall trip, but I have to value myself and say no when someone attempts to undervalue me.  I offer a service, and I expect to be paid for that service in a profitable manner. While I truly enjoy what I do, it's very hard and dirty work, and I do a damned good job.  That's why I charge the rates I charge, you get what you pay for and you get a lot from me when I work for you.  I've had housekeepers in the past, and I've come  home from a long, hard day only to clean up the mess the housekeeper has left behind: puddles of cleaning fluid, smears on my windows and doors, and worst of all...Pledge furniture polish buildup on my bathroom tiles.

I am not a charity, I'm not looking for an "opportunity" to get my business name out there.  Out of all the favors I've done for others, I've never seen a referral or money that I was promised in the future.  It was an opportunity for the person whom I helped to save money and get a great deal, and it has always left me feeling angry, bitter, and used.

So I don't do favors.  I reject low ball offers of payment.  I accept rejections from potential clients who feel my prices are too high.  That's life and I will not undervalue myself.

More Reusables

I'll attempt to keep this from becoming a big TMI fest, but it is about menstrual products so beware.

I was a tampon girl since I first got the hang of it.  I always hated pads, hated hated hated them.  That bulky feeling and just knowing that everyone could see the outline through your pants was horrible and humiliating.  It was also probably one of the big contributors to diving head first into the punk/goth scene and embracing JNCOs and other super baggy jeans.

After I had my first child I realized that pads were an evil with whom I had to come to terms.  So I wore them, and I wound up with skin irritations because of the chemicals they contained.  I wound up using some of my son's newborn cloth prefold diapers, specifically for that purpose, they were not mixed up with his, and it was a super bulky relief.

Once I regained my fertility I started searching for alternative options to tampons because while I had some cloth pads, I was not fond of the bulk or the laundry.  It just wasn't a pleasant thing to empty out menstrual pads into my washer, even coming from the dirty hippie chick...it was just gross to me.  I saw menstrual sponges but nixed them because I didn't feel they'd be clean enough and then I found a Diva Cup.

Back in those days, you know the ones, when online shopping wasn't a huge thing and the "green" living hadn't quite caught on...life was tough back then...I had to order my Diva Cup through a private seller, similar to Avon or the like.  Today you can find them in any health food store, but back then I ordered mine from a woman online and it arrived in a lumpy, yet discreet, yellow manila envelope.

I squealed, got excited, and didn't menstruate for another nine months since I was pregnant.

Most women will tell you that the secret to getting pregnant is to order a menstrual cup.

So cue the cloth pads again and months of lactational amenorrhea and finally I got my period again. I wasn't fond of my Diva, it was just too rigid and uncomfortable.  The suction sometimes felt like it was trying to suck out my uterus.  So I hit the internet again and came across what I consider a training cup, Insteads.  They were much more flexible and user friendly, but they leaked.  This is where my handy dandy cloth panti liners came in.  I'd ordered a ton of them years prior and used them, but they were put into full rotation.  So I still had my cup and I was now putting those flannel panti liners to use.

A few years later I got an IUD placed and had to let the Insteads go since they can potentially dislodge an IUD.

Finally, I got my tubes tied and decided to purchase a Lunette cup since I no longer had any fears of hearing that metal *tink* into the toilet bowl.  It was a total impulse buy, I just happened to see it in a natural parenting store while buying laundry detergent, but when I held it I was impressed with how flexible and contouring it was.

I fell in love with my Lunette.  I rarely have issues with leaking or that sucking out my innards sensation and the stem is short, but not too short, so it isn't pokey, and I don't have to...well...fish to pull it out.

Some time ago I realized that all my flannel panti liners had gone by the wayside, I only had one old faithful left.  Then, a month ago, a pagan friend of mine invited me to her twin daughter's womanhood ritual.  They're officially women so they're going to celebrate with a ritual and bestowing gifts that women will need in their lives.  I contacted her with the idea of sewing them some panti liners and she gave me the green light so off I went to the fabric store with coupons in hand and sat down to sew.

A quick picture tutorial on making cloth pads:

I started out by laying my last remaining liner on the fabric, folded in half, and then simply cut around it.  I modified it to be a little bigger, but stayed true to the shape.

 I cut them out (remember, two layers of fabric so they match perfectly) with my amazing rotary cutter.

Lined them up, ready to sew.

I turned the fabric to face itself (wrong side out), being sure to keep the corresponding sides together and then sewed all but the top edge with a basic straight stitch.

I then flipped them right side out (you can see the one that's been flipped and the rest are still waiting to be turned).

Time to sew the top closed.  Simply fold it in to form a 1/4" seam and then topstitch it closed.  Continue the topstitching all the way around the liner to give it more structure and a more finished look.

Place snaps either using a press or a hammer, I used hammer snaps.  Hammer snaps are my preferred for this since my press tends to punch through, but do be careful lining them up properly, I ruined two with misfires and fixed a couple by separating and rebending the prongs to try again.

They're cute!  They're soft!  And they're totally reusable.  The one I used for a guide is probably 12 years old, if I recall correctly, and still kicking strong.  I'm looking forward to my new, cute cloth panti liners, and I hope the gift for the twins will be appreciated.

I'd say the cost for the materials was around $20 at my local big box fabric store (with coupons), and I made 24 (including the two screw ups).  The snaps were the most expensive items and if I make more I'll be ordering online next time.

Snow Day!

The cold frigid northern south has gotten snow for the first time in five years.  This means that life grinds to a halt, everything closes, and we all hunker down with good food, strong drink, and entertainment.  Since I grew up in the very southernmost part of the country, I still see snow as a novelty and squeal with excitement when it starts to flutter down from the sky.  Of course, even sleet and teeny tiny specks of snowflakes are enough to make me jump up and down, but by the time I went to sleep last night I admit that I was feeling a bit of despair as it had been sleeting/icing (not sure what terms to use, frozen precipitation that's not fluffy?) all evening and I'd promised my kids snow in the morning.

Thankfully, oh so thankfully, there was a beautiful blanket of snow on the ground when I woke up early this morning.  Then I realized I'd left my camera at my friend's house after a get together last weekend and I felt a bit of annoyance since I have my camera phone to shoot with.  I made the best of what I have, and even lowered myself to use my boyfriend's Nikon, but I think my phone took better images since I'm unfamiliar with his camera and wasn't sure how to operate it in manual mode.  It makes me feel dirty to use a dSLR in point and shoot mode.

So we woke up to

and there were two very excited children begging to go out.  I told them later and grabbed two very reluctant chihuahuas to take them out for potty time.  My female did her usual dance at the door and jet out as quickly as possible only to stop stock still, leaving little doggy paw skid marks in the snow on the porch, because she had no clue what was on the ground.  My male took a bit of encouragement to even get out the door since he can smell snow and despises it passionately, a well placed slipper got him moving in the right direction.  The poor things had a record-time morning potty break and the male was sent back out several times to "Go Potty!" since I know he'd much prefer to do his pooping the warmth and comfort of a hidden corner, but they did it and then scurried back into the living room and burrowed under blankets and children seeking warmth.

I fixed a hearty breakfast and then sent the children on a scavenger hunt for long underwear, clothing, and winter gear.  After about an hour of "I can't find" and "I can't get it on" we were ready to head out into the cold and snow.

They dove straight into the snow and I hedged my way into the backyard to check on the chickens.  The girls were huddled in their coop with the heating lamp for warmth, but seemed fine so I knocked the ice out of their water dispenser, threw them a double ration of feed, and joined the kids for a snow fight.  

This snow isn't snowball snow.  I've never seen snowball snow in the six times I've been in the snow, but powdery stuff that doesn't compact isn't snowball snow, even I know that.  So we made do with scooping up handfuls of snow and chucking it at each other.  I, of course, was the victor until I gave up when two neighborhood kids joined in over the fence and it was four against one.  Even I know when the odds are stacked against me and when it's time to wave the white flag.  So I tooled around the yard, shooting with the boyfriend's camera, and fiddled with stuff in the yard.  Girl and I played together and ran around, played on the swings, and then we moved to the front to go for a walk and scout out potential sledding hills.  I grabbed a lid to one of my storage bins, just in case.

Well, the storage bin failed, but we found a spot and headed home for lunch.  After some screen time, lunch, more screen time, sewing (for me), and playing, I finally succumbed to the pleas and took the kids out for a second time.  I inflated a tube we use at the lake in the summer and we headed to our hill.  We spent about forty five minutes tubing before I begged to go inside.  I was wet from kneeling on the snow to fling kids down the tiny hill and getting very cold.  For some reason it just felt so much colder the second time we were out.  The kids had a blast and I had fun too, I even slid down the hill several times and only shoved the kids down to get an extra turn a few times. 

I feel I set a fine example by making a running jump onto the tube, jarring my neck and shoulders, and showed them exactly why we don't do such wild things.  It was still fun, though my neck and shoulders disagree.  Back in our yard I cleared some snow from my car, filled a bowl with the clean snow underneath, and set it on the porch for a snow cream carrot to dangle when they got unruly.

Then we just laid about and vegged.  I did some laundry, we watched another movie, we played some games, and we plugged in.  Girl and I got into a heated game of Jenga while Boy watched and cheered me on.  I fixed beef stew for dinner and once I successfully bribed them into eating a satisfying amount, I pulled out the snow and snow cream fixings.

Snow

1/2 C sugar

1 C milk

1 1/2 tsp vanilla

I mixed the milk/sugar mixture earlier in the day to let the sugar dissolve and just stored it in the fridge.  I spooned the snow into the bowl to fill it about halfway and poured the mixture over it until it was just slightly wet.  At first I whisked it together, but grabbed a spoon since it wasn't doing a very good job.  It took about two minutes to stir it up properly, but once it was ready it was delicious.  Very creamy and very vanilla.  The kids loved it.  I didn't use much of the ingredients so I put the snow outside again and the mixture back in the fridge for tomorrow.

The snow really compacted down when mixed up and I now understand why the recipe I found online called for a full gallon of snow for 1 cup of milk and 1 cup of sugar (I halved the sugar).

After snow cream, the kids sort of devolved and I'd reached my limit by that point.  Boy brought in a huge load of wood and then I sent them to brush their teeth in the hopes of signaling a wind down and beginning a quiet evening by the fire.  It was not to be as they screeched and howled at each other since one decided that the toilet lid was a fine seat to use while brushing and the other felt it was their seat first.  I ignored them for a while, but finally reached my breaking point and screamed that the day was over and it was time for bed.  Cue much wailing and gnashing of teeth as fingers were pointed and blame was shifted.

Then they went to bed.

They're off school tomorrow too.  I had to shift my work schedule to be home with them so I'm off as well.  I hope we make it out alive.